can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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