I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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