My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
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I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
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how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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