how can u be prego again
Tell her she can't have a vagina
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
