there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
