susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
