You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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