It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize