You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize