is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
