I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
