I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.