My girlfriend figured out who you are.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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