I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
