Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
you win again, gameday.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
