and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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