Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
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I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
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I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea