While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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