So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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