Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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