Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
