I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize
