well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
