I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize