Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize