We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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