I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
