My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
