When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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