dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
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im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
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There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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