I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
