I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
im holly from the hills drunk
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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