Already got asked if we're dating
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Randomize