I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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