I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
