he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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