You're completely useless in the revolution.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
