Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
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