I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
