I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
