I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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