Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
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Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
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She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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