Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Randomize