I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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