some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
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