i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
no you cant smoke seaweed
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
