it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize