I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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