i don't like sucking hair
oh god the rape fog is back!
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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