just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize