yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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