It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
